The Now, The Upcoming:
In this Edition:
Quote.
Update: Now and Upcoming.
Motivate: Freeze State.
Let’s Talk Books - What I’m Reading.
New Onyx Story and Podcast!
My Favorite Things: Flora + Moon.
New Cover for My Free Novelette - Just for Fun.
Final thoughts.
For my newsletter subscribers, I did a giveaway of the book: It’s One Of Us by J.T. Ellison and announced the winner in today’s newsletter. To get on the list so you’ll be aware of other giveaways, signup here.
Update:
The False Flat (my women’s fiction novel) is being submitted to editors.
The Love Pentagon (“sequel” to The False Flat) is being edited (by moi).
Consumed is being read. (by my agent and a few other critiquers).
Quick pause here. I just received feedback from one of my beta readers who was reading Consumed. Here’s what she said:
“I finished your novel last night at 11PM. It was so so so so good! I enjoyed it SO much!!! I couldn’t put it down. Thank you for letting me read your novel.”
Y’all I’ve got real tears in my eyes. I can’t tell you how good it feels to have this revised book resonate with someone like this.
Last week, as part of my giveaway, I asked newsletter subscribers to enter by telling me what topics they’d like to see. I got some great suggestions.
It got me thinking about the recent Q & A session I did with my writing group “How I got My Agent.”
It ended up being a lot of fun and the attendees seemed to benefit from my “lecture.” The session was recorded, and I added it to my YouTube channel. If you’re interested, you can view it here. It’s nearly an hour and a half long, and I didn’t edit it.
The questions asked there and the emailed suggestions I received have given me some great ideas. I can’t wait to dive into these topics.
I’ll do this over the next several newsletters: a mix of writing advice/pearls I’ve learned along the way and a little more about my writing process and how I create characters.
Here’s a bit of what you can expect in the coming weeks:
) How it feels to have an agent who loves my writing and “has my back”.
) The surprises/the unexpected I’ve encountered in my submission journey. Those things I didn’t think about ahead of time.
) Demystifying the query process a bit: how I chose who to send my book to, along with tips and considerations I wish I’d thought of before I started.
) What I think MUST be in a pitch to catch an agent’s eye.
) My favorite writing resources.
) How I choose my characters.
) How much of me/my life goes into my novels.
) My thoughts on following “the rules” of writing.
) How I come up with novel ideas.
) What’s kept me going in the face of rejection. (This is one LONG process.)
) Genre expectations.
) Different ways of pitching a novel.
) Expectations vs reality of the publication process.
) Do I still have doubts?
) And of course, you’re getting more book reviews.
And it’ll all probably be jarringly honest. (I really need emojis on my desktop.)
Next week: How to compile a list of agents to submit to. The article’s already up. Check it out here.
Motivate:
I recently started following the.holistic.psychologist on Instagram because a marketing coach recommended her to me. (I don’t have a marketing coach, but I follow one who gives great advice.)
T.H.P. “teaches people to heal and consciously create a new version of themselves.”
She has good advice, but she also thrives on posting photo carousels that are quite successful. I’m following her for both. Inspired by her, I created a fun carousel for Onyx Publications.
Her most recent post hit me though. “If you procrastinate, it’s not because you’re lazy. It’s because your body is in a threat state.”
I’d call this burnout. And I've experienced it recently, despite all my attempts at self-care, so this post spoke to me. She calls it a “Freeze” state.
I found myself putting off tasks. I stopped posting on social media regularly. I wasn’t responding to all emails in a timely fashion. I was ignoring problems because I didn’t want to address them. That’s not like me.
So I thought I’d share this in case anyone has experienced the same recently.
In essence, you find yourself so “tired” that you no longer have the urge to “push through.”
Her advice is a slow progression forward, but that wouldn’t have worked for me.
I love people. I love connecting with people. BUT I’m an introvert. I recharge by being alone, having treasured time to myself where I’m not in a frenzy to get something done.
I realized I’d had a huge increase in social interactions, and I wasn’t pulling away like I needed to to recharge. I kept pushing myself to do more social stuff even when I didn’t want to until I hit a wall.
I was ignoring what I know I need to do to feel like myself. I needed time away. Not a bath, not a shopping trip, not a fun meal I didn’t have to cook.
If you’re feeling frozen or overwhelmed or burnt out, listen to your body. It’ll usually tell you what you need. Though, sometimes, we’re so “frozen” we’re not even sure. That’s probably when you reach out for outside help.
That’s not what I’m talking about here.
For me: I was “caring” for myself, but not in the fundamental way I needed to. Like putting Band-aids on a gaping wound. Sometimes, you just need stitches.
It’s funny how we know what we need to do, but we don’t always give ourselves permission to do it.
I know I need some time during the week to myself. If I ignore that need for long enough, I don’t function as well and my family/friends don’t get my best.
Maybe you need to hear this too. So many of us live in survival mode. And this can lead to self-criticism. “Why can’t I just…”
The Holistic Psychologist got over 80,000 likes on her post in 4 hours. Makes me think a lot of people can relate to this topic.
Are you ignoring what you know you need?
Let’s Talk Books-What I’m reading:
No book review this week because I haven’t completed a read, here’s why:
(Actually, I did read a full novel, but I refuse to rate it right now because it’s by an author I adore, but I didn’t love the book and there are SO MANY 5-star ratings. I’m so confused by this. I’ll probably discuss it next week just as a matter of literary growth. Ugh. So frustrated.)
Now that I’ve been cryptic, let me tell you what I’ve tried/am trying:
I’ve finally given up (for now) on Wrong Place, Wrong Time by Gilliam McAllister. The thing is, it’s a good book! I think it’s well written, well done. But I don’t care about the characters enough to continue. However, most everyone who reads it, rates it high. It’s got over 4 stars out of 110,000 ratings. I mean surely I’m missing something! And it was a nominee for Best Mystery & Thriller in 2022! I want to love it! I do see merit here though.
I started reading Signal Fires by Dani Shapiro. It came recommended and it’s on “need to read” lists. It started well, but I’m not as drawn into the book at chapter 2 as I’d hoped. I’m only 5% in, so I’ll give it a little more, but this is a library checkout, and I have 8 days to decide.
Notes On An Execution by Danya Kukafka. Again, another well-regarded, recommended read. I’m 26% into this one, and it’s very compelling, but it’s also depressing. My library loan lapsed, and I’m not sure I’m going to check it out again because I don’t think I’m in the mood for this. However, very interesting. It’s delivering on a promise. Over 40,000 reviews on Goodreads, nominated for best fiction 2022 and has over 4 stars rating.
The Love Square by Laura Jane Williams. I have to read this one! I mean, the book I wrote and am editing is titled The Love Pentagon, so I might be able to use this as a comp title, but Stephen’s convinced I’ll have to change my title because this book exists. Maybe, but the premise is different even though there are multiple suitors in each work, so I think I’m good there.
New Onyx Story and Podcast:
My People
Written by Eric Diekhans
Narrated by Melissa Collings (Me)
This short story is about 2 “sisters,” and how one (adopted) wants to find her people and the other (not adopted) helps her. It’s a story of red and blue. Who we are. Who we come from. And how we define family.
My Favorite Things:
I’ve mentioned these candles from Flora + Moon before, but I was at the Franklin farmer’s market recently, and I stopped by her booth again.
I ended up leaving with a new set of three tumbler candles, the last of her winter edition because the scents were heavenly.
I’m obsessed with these candles.
Candles, particularly, the flickering flame and scents, are scientifically proven to calm us/reduce anxiety.
I’ve always loved them, but I’m very sensitive to smells. I get headaches easily from perfumes and scented candles. So I never used them until recently…
When I found Flora + Moon candles.
The lady who makes them is in Nashville, of course, but she ships everywhere.
I also got some candle education I didn’t know until I was educated at this delightful woman’s booth. (I can’t remember her name!) Here’s what she shared:
Did you know you’re supposed to trim your candle’s wick? Before every burn (except the first), you should trim the wick to a 1/4 inch. This gives you a smoke-free burn, keeps your flame from getting too big, and makes your candle last longer!
Before you blow out your candle (the ones in jars, at least), make sure the wax has melted all the way to the edges to prevent “tunneling".” This keeps it burning evenly.
Don’t burn more than 4 hours at a time!
This has changed the way I do candles. And I highly recommend these candles. I use them most days during my meditation.
An Extra Item:
There’s a free novelette (long short story) on my website. And I just created a new “cover” for it, and I wanted to share. Here it is!
I thought it was a nice change.
Final thoughts:
Okay, now that you’re exhausted from reading all my words (if you made it), I hope your day, your week, your life is spectacular.
Much glitter,
Melissa
p.s. Loving this blog? Get my weekly content: timely updates, book reviews, book bonuses, essentially, ways to love yourself, others, and books! And get email-only specials. Sign up for my weekly newsletter.
